It’s MY birthday and I’ll do what I WANT to

My birthday is coming. I’ve grown to not like my birthday. I’m not old enough to hate birthdays yet I’m not looking forward to it and I think this is just the beginning of dreading my birthday. (I’ll be 29 – Feb 21)

Growing up, birthdays weren’t really a huge deal. I had to BEG my mother for a birthday party with friends. Usually we had homemade cake and it was just family, maybe 1 or 2 friends. We didn’t have party favors or booked party locations…. parties were at home and they weren’t a big deal. (If my son only knew what that meant!)

Once married, my husband had some nice birthday parties for me. After having my son, having a birthday party for myself just didn’t seem important. So we started just having dinner with family and whatever friends could make it. It was low key and a simple plan and I was happy with it.

Last year on my birthday as I looked around the table at my family, I realized my family was only there out of obligation. Maybe they wanted to be there too but it sure as hell didn’t feel that way to me. My sister and brothers were not talking to me but were instead having conversations with my step-dad (jack-ass), who wanted all of the attention. I felt like I had to fight to be in the lime light for even a second.

That evening, I saw that the only people remotely interested in spending time talking and interacting with me, on MY birthday, seemed to be my husband, my son and my mother. As I fought off tears the rest of the evening and felt like shit for requesting these people to join us on my birthday for dinner I began to hate my birthday.

NEVER again. I think that birthdays should only be celebrated with the people who are HAPPY you were born and who want to spend time with you.

My inlaws have now entered the picture. They called my husband and mentioned that they want to come into town on the weekend for MY birthday. PLEASE-Let’s be honest here. My IL’s don’t care a shit less that I was born, they don’t want to celebrate MY birthday – they want to come see their son and grandson.

FINE – I’m glad they want to come see their son and grandson – they should want to. BUT, PLEASE don’t use MY birthday as an excuse for driving 3 hours into town, staying a few hours, and driving 3 hours home. Just come earlier… long before MY birthday and visit them and be honest about it. SAY: “We really miss Josh and want to come for a quick visit” What’s so hard about that? Oh – right – my IL’s are void of emotion.

So, will they be coming in for a visit? How can I tell my husband no? As he’s pointed out, they aren’t coming into town ON MY actual birthday. Why should I care?

The “Clique” might be down a Member

Ever since I became a stay at home mom I realized I needed the support and camaraderie of other stay at home moms. I joined a MOMS Club in my area. It took awhile to find my way but soon enough friendships were formed and I made some really great friends in the group.

Fast forward a few years and I just love the friends I’ve made. Some of the other girls call us a clique. I personally HATE that term. We’ve laughingly embraced it and now we even refer to ourselves as The “Clique”. We have the BEST time. We came together because we all have the innate belief in keeping things simple and uncomplicated. No need for LOTS of details…when we want to get together it’s a simple evening or outing. Give us a Time & Place and that’s all we need for a good time – oh, that and who’s bringing what to drink?

Of all of the girls in the “clique” there’s my friend Donna who is really the one who gets me. She never judges me (even when we judge others), we gossip without guilt, she keeps my secrets and I keep hers, we gripe about our husbands and motherhood and the greatest thing of all – we make each other feel better after getting it off our chests.

I’m not very open to starting friendships and I’m not very trusting with girls. I’ve been burned, what can I say. So imagine my disgust when I heard this week that Donna may be moving to Russia. Yes – RUSSIA! Who moves to Russia? Well she might and soon too. Sometime in July or afterwards… Doesn’t she know I’m due at the end of July?!?!?!?

Donna’s husband has been offered the chance of being Partner at work and would have to relocate to Moscow for 2 to 3 years. Now, I know that’s not too long but – DAMN! It hasn’t been completely determined as to if they are going but she’s seriously considering it and so now I am too.

Looks like our days of hanging out are numbered and I can’t tell you how sad that makes me. At least we know we’ll have to make the most of what time we have left.

Those international aisles are interesting.

So there I was. Standing on an aisle in Kroger staring at this. I’d really like to know what it actually is – pork? Beef? Processed food?  But do I dare Google it? I can only imagine the results and the amount of unsavory results. 

Really – I’m serious. I took the picture with my camera phone with the hopes that you can help me figure out what this actually is and how you’d cook such a thing. Steam, broil, bake or grill?

A Baby is Coming

Not until July though and I must admit I’m counting down the days lately. It’s driving me a bit crazy.

This is day number 88 and you’re 12 weeks pregnant!
You have 192 days or 27 weeks left, and are 31.4% of the way there.
Baby’s age since conception is 74 days or 10 weeks. You are due on 7/31/2008.

 Wow - a whopping 31.4% of the way there. Time’s really flying… Only 192 days left. I really dispise Pregnancy Weekly  for putting me through the torturous hell of this countdown. I could stop going to the website but then I wouldn’t get the daily reward of seeing that I made it through another day.

I know – I should enjoy every moment. Maybe I need a new focus, like to decorate the nursery or some sort of project to keep my mind busier. Yeah – that’s it keep my mind – BUSIER!